best of me

a million thoughts rise, thousands of wrestling ideas.

im tangled up, im upset, im terrified by my mediocrity; how can anyone love me?

hundreds of regrets come to mind as soon as you leave..."why cant i better for you?"

i whisper the question into the empty halls of my still heart.

near the center there is only one wish. a red, throbbing thought:

"i want to give the best of me"

why cant i? when your eyes come across my face i feel embarrassed.

who can love this messy girl, the girl who is me?

i melt under your gaze, i have to look away.

your smile feels so warm on me, i feel so small and unworthy.

i can only hope that you see me in a differnet light than i see myself.

i want to give the best of me, you have the best of me...

xx, seiji